Today just seems to be such a relaxed, positive mood. All of the "sickies" that I've been experiencing (flu like symptoms) are gone, mood elevated and positive.
Should be - holiday stress is over. No more long waiting in lines, large groups, fear of incorrect social interactions is gone. Dealing with feelings of inadequacy for not being able to afford even small token gifts of gratitude to others is gone.
Had a small talk with P-Doc, and am going to talk with Phsyc - it seems I fit every criteria for social anxiety - which I knew I had, but nice to have so defined. With this, it shows some course of formalized action for skills and techniques that have been utilized before. I do mindfulness, I also use my ADD/Bipolar to distract me some, however I hope these new ones will help give me ideas that allow for both complete focus and less tension. But whenever I look a person's eyes, esp. one that I like (and I find pretty) - those internal hormonal reactions go, and if I'm not careful, I get semi-manic and can go somewhat overboard. Will need help with that too - the fear of looking into people's eyes? OMG - that's why I look at lips. So much, that I can become somewhat deaf talking to a person if I can't see their lips.
Today will be good. Go home, finish some ASL lessons, and then maybe some games, or even reading Gilgamesh or Nietzsche
.
Peace!
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