"Sprawling on the fringes of the city
In geometric order
An insulated border
In between the bright lights
And the far unlit unknown
Growing up it all seems so one-sided
Opinions all provided
The future pre-decided
Detached and subdivided
In the mass production zone
Nowhere is the dreamer or the misfit so alone..."
I decided to talk to some friends (who are gay) about my sexual bent and the knowledge that I am "bi-sexual" - basically, if I am attractive enough to a person, their sex doesn't matter. I'm attracted to them. However, due to a long-term burn, and an attraction to a male, I have had an increasing number of thoughts of being engaged in a homosexual relationship. Not trying to "widen the field" as all like to say, but experience it.
The male is a great friend, very no-male-suggestions sex, but not "homophobic" -just uncomfortable with the thoughts. Sometimes he seems definitely NOT tending towards that, and other times almost like there might be certain specific occasions.
No maybe this is "playing the field" - but:
One, I want to be good at it for him or any other male I might become attracted to.
Two, at the most basic, simple level, if you become attracted to and end up on the edge of infatuation/desire/love/intimacy, really, why should the sex stop you?
AND TO THINK HOW HYPOCRITICAL MANY IN THE GAY COMMUNITY ARE:
Near genocide events in their past, severe social and cultural inhibitions to overcome, and to find out they are actually bigoted towards bi-sexuals worse than any of my no-male-sex friends or actual homophobes I have run across.
Again, just another aspect on the fractured solarium phisod of humanity, stuck in a quagmire of hypocritical, two-faced, selfish blindness caused by the pathogen of the hubris of denial, burning them with the fever of slothfulness and excessive arrogance.